"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaimed that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed." (Isaiah 61:1 - NLT)
Lupus won’t get me down.
I woke up this morning had mixed feelings about a lot of stuff. Been struggling with my weight and losing my hair. Having lupus is a struggle. I know its not well known most people when I tell them I have it they say whats that? Its a horrible disease but I don’t want to label myself with it. I rather say its not mine because God has it under control. Lupus is a everyday struggle I don’t know what is ahead for me. i don’t know what the doctors are going to find. I think it is as my relationship with God in a sense, I don’t know what is ahead I don’t know what is going to happen but God is in control. Everyday waking up and not knowing how I am going to feel is always a thought but why not wake up to reading the word and just praying? Instead of worrying. Chemo is hard its hard on my body but I know in this season something big is going to happen I don’t see a positive light right now but God can totally change a negative into a positive. I know God is good even when the doctors tell me my kidneys are retaining water I gained about 14 pounds in a week. Or when the doctor says we are running out of options we just have to wait and see if the chemo will work. Hearing all this negative its scary but its important to keep my faith and keep moving forward. My God is bigger then lupus. I know this season in my life I can feel like a whale from gaining so much weight but I know soon and one day I will be able to go back to the gym and my normal weight. I know depression and the enemy can come in and tell me so much nonsense but like I said reading the word and renewing my heart and mind daily is important. I have to keep my eye on the prize that is Jesus Christ. I won’t let lupus get me down.
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